Silent Confessions of the Heart
by Silver Breeze
Summary: With the Tower of Salvation a day away, the Journey of World Regeneration nearing it's end, Colette and Lloyd spend time in Hima contemplating their quest so far, how things have changed, and how their feelings for one another have grown. Chapter 1 Done!
1. Author's Notes

Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia or any of the characters associated with it, I'm pretty sure they belong to Namco, don't sue me! This is fanfiction.

This is a story of the events that happened in Hima, the day before the party reached the Tower of Salvation. I believe that there were a lot of opporitunities to show the relationship between Lloyd and Colette that were ignored, and the way things happened in the game and in my mind are completely different, and it's something I wish to share. I'm sure I'm not the only person who loves Lloyd and Colette, and wonder what a more detailed encounter between them on that day may have seemed like, with emotions as strong as they may have been that day.

I would like to thank everyone who has supported me along the way, encouraging me to continue with my work when I thought it was silly and no one would be interested, and to Namco for making me fall in love with a cast of characters and their story.

All comments and reviews are welcome and encouraged, good or bad, it's you guys that will improve my writing, and that make me want to keep going with this!


	2. Chapter 1: Quiet Moments

A cool breeze blew gently across the land, rustling grass and trees at the base of the plateau as it passed. It was a pretty day. The sun shone brightly, bathing the land in its quiet, gentle warmth, and only a few clouds dared to obscure the cerulean sky above. Atop the plateau, it was the perfect spot to look at the work of the Chosen, breathing life and mana back into the land that, not long ago, so desperately needed it. The person responsible for such a dramatic change sat atop that very plateau at that moment, quietly contemplating the work she had done, and what was still left to come.

Colette sat quietly, her legs pulled under her as she silently observed the world of Sylvarant. Never did she have a chance like this to look upon the world she was born to save, to think about the things she had done so far. The long journey that had lasted day after day, week after week, was finally coming to a close. Behind her was the town of Hima, the famed "City of Adventurers" although it only consisted of a small inn and a graveyard. She smiled slightly, thinking about how things didn't always turn out how one would expect, and she knew that all too well.

Anyone would think that becoming an angel would be a wonderful thing, and it was, in a way. She was saving the world of Sylvarant, but at the cost of her own health and suffering. There were things happening to her body that could not be described as wonderful. The wings were amazing and beautiful, just as she'd always imagined they would be, but she never though they would make her sick and weak, eventually taking away her sense of taste with them. Soon after she was blessed with the ability to sing like an angel, to inspire and protect her friends, but she soon found out afterward how dreadfully hard it was to fall asleep. It was when she could no longer feel that she knew that she was slowly giving up her humanity, and everything that made her her, to become an angel and to save the world. She never imagined it would be this hard.

While one may think for a person who had to fight as much as her would be happy that pain was so easily dulled away, she was not. She could no longer feel soothing warmth, like climbing under a nice blanket when it was cold, little things like back rubs and tickling, and the loving embrace of the person she cared for most, Lloyd. No matter how hard the journey had been, the one thing that kept her going the most was him, whether it was comforting her after a hard time, protecting her as he did, or taking care of her when her toxicosis made her sick, he was always there for her and it made her so happy.

Happiness, at least she still had that left, somewhat. She never imagined the Journey of Regeneration would be so difficult, but then again, the very reason she was on the journey was because the previous Chosen had failed. She looked up at the sky, inhaling deeply as a gentle wind blew the golden strands of her hair as it swept over her. She released it with a sigh, shaking her head and silently scolding herself. Tomorrow the journey was over, she would finally accomplish what she set out to do, and yet, as happy as she should be, she would be lying if she said she wasn't frightened.

What was she doing? She came out here to get some air, and to think to herself. She should be thinking, wondering about things other than the soon end of her adventure with her friends, happier things, like him.

She quietly began tracing in the loose dirt and gravel around her, absentmindedly drawing as she thought to herself. She had all day tomorrow to think about tomorrow, today she should be happy, thinking happy thoughts. She nodded to herself, continuing to draw. Happy thoughts like being home again, seeing her friends at school, and getting the things back that she had lost. She sighed and looked down at the messy drawing, and began to blush as she did. She wasn't much of an artist, but it didn't take one to express your feelings. The squiggles resembled people, two big headed stick figures in fact. The one on the left stood a head taller than the other, erratic lines and curves coming from its head that resembled hair, and it wore two sticks at its side. The other stood to his right, long lines extending from its head to its makeshift waist, a triangle drawn over its body that resembled a dress of some sorts. Both of them wore smiles on their faces, their hands joined together. As Colette continued to look at her drawing she giggled to herself. She had to admit it was pretty cute. Then she began to draw little hearts and stars into the dirt around her picture, their love for each other visible to anyone watching, at least in this picture. As she finished that, she slowly, carefully in beautiful writing in contrast to the messy art, began to finish the expression, completing her feelings as she traced the words into the ground. "Lloyd, I love you..."

It had taken her some time to realize this, this feeling she had whenever they were together, whenever she thought about him, everything about him. The way his eyes always burned with intensity as he fought and defended her. The same eyes that showed concern for her when she wasn't feeling well. He had the eyes of a leader despite his age, and those same eyes were soft and beautiful when he was with her. He was as caring as he was strong, and she always felt better, safer when he was there. Whether it was him comforting her with his words or his warm embrace, holding her tight when the stress and fatigue of their journey began to wear her down and encouraging her to be strong. It was a feeling she had for no one else, and now she knew what it was, and why she felt it. She loved him, and every part of her wanted to shout it.

She had tried so many times to tell him how she really felt. But whenever he was around and she had a chance to tell him, she always lost the words, and she could never quite tell him. She looked up and sighed, scolding herself in her mind again as she quietly thought. Why couldn't she just say it, she loved him but at this rate he would never know. Now that she couldn't talk, it seemed impossible that she could tell him. Today was her last day to say something, but she couldn't even speak the words she needed to say.

The harsh crunch of dirt and gravel behind her startled her, she jumped slightly with a start as she was taken from her thoughts. Despite her her feelings at the time, she put on her best smile as she turned to face who was probably one of her friends, and as she did, her heart skipped a beat.

Lloyd caught sight of her the same moment she turned around to see who was coming up the plateau, and smiled. "There you are..." he said to her, as he began to walk over to where she was sitting. "I was wondering where you went off too, I thought maybe we could talk..." he paused, and then held his hand out to her. "Well, you can write." Colette smiled.

The two of them sat near the edge of the plateau, looking out across the sky silently for a moment, before Lloyd finally spoke. "How have you been doing Colette? I haven't seen you since last night." Lloyd said, looking over at her. Colette nodded and gave him a thumbs up. She could tell her heart as already pounding, doing nothing but sitting next to him. "That's good..." he said, looking back down.

"You know... I've been thinking a lot lately Colette," she looked at him and tilted her head to the side curiously. "About this journey, this other world that Sheena talks about a lot, and about you. I don't have much time left Colette." Lloyd sighed as he looked up at the Tower of Salvation on the horizon, the place where their journey would end tomorrow. "I'll find a way to help you Colette, I promise. There was to be a way to do this without you suffering like this, it's not right, and I can't take it." Lloyd looked over at her and Colette could easily see the pain and the anger in his eyes.

"It's not right, I can't stand seeing you like this", he whispered quietly, "I don't want you to be an angel if you have to suffer, and I'm sure you don't want it to be like this either." Colette nodded at him, she felt terrible that the changes she was going through was hurting him this badly. She had to admit that she missed all the things she was losing. She took his hand in hers and began to write slowly. She had a lot to say, but luckily Lloyd had become quite good at reading the letters she wrote on his hand quickly.

"I am okay Lloyd..." she paused for a moment to consider her thoughts. She wrote how she felt on his palm, with Lloyd reading every word aloud, with her nodding along at his understanding. "I knew that this journey was going to require sacrifice on my part, on the parts of us and our friends that journey with us, but I didn't expect it to be this way. It's fine though Lloyd, because if my suffering and sacrifice mean that the people of Sylvarant can be happy, then I guess it's something I can bear for the good of everyone."

Lloyd smiled slightly and embraced her gently, as if she were very fragile. "You're strong Colette." he whispered to her. Deep down inside she knew that he wouldn't be completely happy until she was completely better. She put her head on his shoulder and wrapped her arms around him and nodded. As long as Colette was concerned, she could stay like this forever. She silently confessed her love for him at that moment.

Lloyd finally released her after a few moments, and she took his hand again and began to write. She had to tell him, tell him those three little words she desperately needed him to know. "I..." she wrote slowly, looking down as her face began to glow and her heart began to race. That's one word down, or letter, she thought to herself. "Lo..." she continued, her hand trembling as she did. "I Lo... what?" Lloyd asked her, is something the matter Colette?" She stopped writing, not able to continue. She looked away from him, her face flushed. "Are you okay?" he questioned her, trying to get her to look at him. Colette nodded nervously looking back down at the ground. "Well okay, if you say so, you were acting a little weird there..." Lloyd admitted as he shrugged.

"Well I just wanted to make sure you were okay Colette, I'm going to go talk to the others for a bit, to make sure everyone is ready for tomorrow." he said as he stood and stretched a bit. "You be careful up here, and don't stay too long, you might catch a..." he paused and then smacked himself on the forehead, "never mind." Colette nodded at him, only partially paying attention. He ruffled her hair a bit before turning to head back down to Hima.

"...can't believe it." Colette said to herself silently as Lloyd began to leave. "I could have told him but I choked...so stupid." She thought she had the courage to tell him how she felt, but not enough it seemed. She looked up at him, and before she knew it she was on her feet, trying to catch up with him. Lloyd turned as he heard the sound of her feet behind him, just in time to see her trip, and react quickly enough to catch her as she went face first for the ground.

"What are you doing you dork? It's not a good idea to run up here you know...what were you in such a rush for?" Lloyd asked as he helped up back to her feet. Colette smiled innocently at him and took his hand. "Do you think we can talk some more... here tonight?" she wrote on his hand as he read aloud. She looked up at him hopefully, and let out a breath she didn't even know she was holding as he nodded at her. "Sure" he said, "just as long as you promise not to run up here anymore silly. She gave him a thumbs up and smiled at him as she watched him town and head back to the Inn. When he was out of sight, she walked back to where she was sitting and looked up into the sky. She only had a couple of hours to muster up the courage to tell Lloyd how she felt.


End file.
